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Between candour and being a dream wrecker.

Scared to tell the honest truths?

For anyone born before the late 80’s, you might have come to a conclusion (hasty or not) that people born from the 90s are quite sensitive. I sometimes entertain this thought too. From the perceptions of how we are viewed by the public, popular trends and the herd mentality, I’d agree that people tend to be more sensitive nowadays — even over the seemingly little things.

This prevalent sensitivity finds us censoring or diluting our opinions regardless how much thought we’ve put into it. The fear of being attacked or trolled sometimes leaves us biting our tongues when on the verge of spilling these opinions. But, how much longer can we keep biting our tongues?

Credit: Unsplash / Kristina Flour

If life was a piece of art, it would be a combination of really fine lines.”

At times when we tend to be hypersensitive and easily triggered, these lines become even finer. I find that we are more eager to hear patronizing comments than we are to hear pure, uncut truths. In the same vein, we are quick to downplay our thoughts and opinions for concerns of appearing malicious.

It is one thing to encourage a friend’s potential and an entirely different thing to egg them on to believe they have the innate resources for a certain task. Certainly, there are exceptional instances of starting out with absolutely no potential but then proceed to attain mastery — some recessive potential would still likely have played a part.

“But then if you lied to a man about his talent just because he was sitting across from you, that was the most unforgivable lie of them all, because that was telling him to go on to continue which was the worst way for a man without real talent to waste his life finally. But many people did just that, friends and relatives mostly. . .” ~ Charles Bukowski

Is it better to risk being tagged a ‘dream wrecker’ by telling the truth and airing our opinions? Or consistently take them back, right before you let them go? Sure, some might feel bad about your candour but, as soon as they can get emotions out of the way, they would quit running in the wrong direction and actually review things, strengthening their resolves. In the event that they disregard your truths, find solace in the fact that you took the chance putting it out there.

Tell your truths, air your opinions but be sure to be ready to back them up. Treading this fine line between candor and being dubbed a dream-wrecker however requires caution and good sense and on some days, subtlety.


Between candour and being a dream wrecker. was originally published in ILLUMINATION on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.

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